"you don't matter enough to upset me."

This might just be me, but I feel like the weeks have been going by especially slow lately. I feel like I don't have a lot of time for things when I obviously do because I manage to get everything that needs to be done, done. Being that said, this is the first time in months that I haven't had work to do after school. Needless to say, I felt this would be an appropriate time to attempt to write about the past week and a half.


Last Monday was Halloween, which evidently wasn't even nearly as awesome as it has been in years past. There was this whole issue with having a foreign friend come to school with me, which ended up in us just going back to my house and screwing around with makeup. I decided to play around with the theme of Twiggy.

le result:

Lately, I feel like I've been suppressing a lot of emotions for the sake of moving on, in a sense, and mainly just to get everything done efficiently without feelings getting in the way. However, I'm not entirely sure if that's a very good strategy because I found all of these emotions hitting me incredibly hard on Sunday. I need to figure out whether or not I would prefer to have emotional fits every few days or just one big breakdown at the end of the week. Right now, I'm leaning towards the latter, just for the sake of it not getting in the way of getting work done. Anywho, I was in the weirdest emotional mood on Sunday, I really didn't want to do anything and I just felt like crying. But there was nothing there to make me cry. It was as if the feelings were there, but something had to happen to make me cry. So I go onto iTunes to try and download Titanic... Come to find out that iTunes doesn't even HAVE it. However, I found a Titanic slideshow on YouTube to the Mika song "Happy Ending" which was more than enough to get me sobbing within the first three seconds. Seriously though.



I then got to thinking about how much I actually adore Kate Winslet and how I really should be familiar with more of her films than just Titanic and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. So over the week, I rented and bought Revolutionary Road - hooray for a Kate and Leo rekindling

 - and The Reader.  

Here's the thing about Revolutionary Road - every single morning on my way to school I watch these boring suburban parents drop off their asshole teenage kids at school at 7am. I see them sit alone at the stoplight in their cars tired as all hell and I can't help but think that I never want to end up like that. To be a stay-at-home mom or even a working mom living in a well-off suburban town with the same routine every day for the rest of my life. I couldn't do it. I don't want to be trapped. Also, The Reader has changed the way I view things. The movie alone made me nearly cry about five times. I just feel like Hanna and Michael's love seemed so genuine in the movie that their age played absolutely no role in their relationship whatsoever and was, if anything, completely irrelevant (ps. the scene when they make love for the last time on his birthday makes me want to bawl because you can just see the inner turmoil that Hanna is going through).  And let me just say that both movies are incredible and highly recommended. I'm also planning on watching Heavenly Creatures today and Little Children, The Holiday, and Quills later on this weekend. Also, Carnage opens in theaters on December 16th for me. So, yeah, it's been a Kate Winslet week for me.

I also can't get over her face. Other than the fact that she is absolutely stunning in all sense of the word and has the sassiest right eyebrow ever, she embodies her characters so incredibly well that every subtle movement is entirely that of her character. I can't even properly describe it, but if you've seen a Kate Winslet film, you'll know what I mean. I'm going to keep going on the subject of Kate Winslet and say that I love how she's a real woman. I think she's the only actress to make me happy with my body and very, very proud to be a woman.